i'll carry u w/ me

by boy haunter

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about

go on then go on then sometimes oceans move sideways sometimes the world goes sideways sometimes there are reminders and sometimes there are panic attacks and throughout it all just keep ur iphone on yr hip and keep them gun fingers in the air as i go into the ground lemme see dem gun fingers

credits

released December 18, 2015

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about

boy haunter London, UK

1995

my name is caleb

a baby surviving in the water

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Track Name: i want halos in me
my ocean light doesnt want me

suck the faucets dry
fill my lungs with tides
feel closer when oceans hide
i filled with room with sweat
watched as delicate
skylights brushed n dazzled life

beneath yr wizard strings
warm and comforting
all pretty, away from bricks
with bricks in our teeth
cars choking with leaves
branches become his ribs

i want halos in me

halos in me now
as cement surrounds
shimmering fluorescent heat
and i drove so fast
that i almost crashed
throw the keys as our halos meet

i want halos in me
Track Name: we buried her today
we buried her today in the yard
i can hear you go, it's beautiful even in the dark
but now you've left and i can feel your breath
i know yr out there somewhere listening thru air
your halos and oceans that exit thru the wind
that make their way thru jagged rock 2 live inside my skin

Mommy know I am still who you love
just that boy You've been dreaming would come

The traffic lights won't stop me
I want to be sleeping
My eyes open
Feeling the wind then nothing
All the oceans, I haven't stopped loving
Track Name: we lack form
we lack form

and now you're lost

I'm graceless and firm

senseless and stern

with all my biting back that held us apart

under scenes from me, I draw with my little finger

under my pillow when the night is longer

and if I could bury the ocean in my chest and drown I would

it would be a mindful death and heaven would no longer take me under

there are white flags billowing pinned to my chest
Track Name: if it wasnt for the hunting
if it wasnt for the hunting
we wouldnt have shelter
i will gather wood
and do what i should
wash my flash lights in skin
let me cave in
down your fogs i will swim
over my child abandoned

i heard my mother cry
and felt my heart die
my canopies and logs
with my flash lights n fogs
feeling the halos run short
i find my balance in yours
blood falls softer than leaves
no one saw what my shoulders were holding for me

i carry u w me
Track Name: the porches were so hot
and the tattoos
he left on your wedding day
were all to be plucked from your skin.
bedrooms we left for the kill

show me the tattoos under your flowers,
the tattoos you wished for,
the tattoos you survived
when the porches were on fire.

each of our bloody teeth
were held closer between our cheeks
in our hunger and slaughter
their bodies rose to speak,

as we remember a husband
under the flowers this fall
a good boyfriend with
fists all on us
and the fields you felt
all his bruises grow.

and the porch was so hot
the porch was so hot
that summer

show me the tattoos under your flowers,
the tattoos you wished for,
the tattoos you survived
when the porches were on fire.

everything will be alright
Track Name: he crushed all yr porches
he crushed all your porches now
i'm jumping in your canyons loud
with fists laid flat to hold your winds
your quicksand leaves me out of my skin

i was high, i was strong but i
wached you die in time you will survive
the awful forest fires in your house

yr alone and yr swimming in roots of tides
i want you to climb out from sweat filled skies
and circle surround my yards and limbs
and forever in nights of broken organs

i was strong, my head was so high
but i watched you die, in time you will survive
the awful forest fires in your house
Track Name: wet forests
i closed my windows to silence the cars
then i stared at the trampoline in the yard
wet forests, i'll drive, heat up the creekwater
so we dont die
we'll go and live where previously we saw death
we'll hike thru mountains n not mask our sweat
and swallow our teeth, make firewood from our beds

in the cool glow
in our nest beneath the springs asleep
on my chest
in the cool glow
in our nest beneath the springs asleep
on my chest

wet forests our voices webbed
whistling, i'll carry u
laughing at most if not, all of us
Track Name: i felt yr oceans
i felt your halos combing thru my hair
it made me feel like i wasnt scared
and in your face theres angels over it
angels over it singing through the spit

but i felt the warmth
of your tides
an ocean puppy
in your eyes
i dreamt last year was all a lie
and we got back together just to try

i felt your halos gliding through my brain
painting flowers between your shoulderblades
i felt the feeling of keeping you so warm
as he buries his thunder in your shores

but i felt the warmth
of your eyes
an ocean puppy
all alive
i dreamt last year we didnt fight
we got together before you tried
to take your life
Track Name: swimming deep
all was colder, keeping our blood
inside the freezers, with our animals skinned
you were close with the backyard spinning
rewind his homes let it glow
keep it swollen, just keep us halos
swimming deep through the oceans
coral reefs in our bones
hold me mama, i feel i'm sinking
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't hold my breath

in his lungs let him sink in you deep
such dizzy is the creekbed, all of us weep
alone in the backyard, swimming we freeze
all the holes in the blankets, swallow the breeze
swollen and slow, in his lungs he sinks
swimming through your fridge
through silvers and tricks
hold me mama, i feel i'm sinking
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't hold my breath

let yourself gather, let yourself be late
all rust on the bike chains, our suburbs so safe
for a second the creekbeds, made their ways dry
never enough room in, myself just to try
swollen and losing, these fruits on our tongues
the milk in our chest, to box up our lungs
hold me mama, i feel i'm sinking
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't keep swimming deep
i can't hold my breath